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I feel like I need one little thread in here, where instead of me writing about a topic, I should field some questions from you. So if you REALLY wanna know the answer (whether it be fact, or just my absolutely insane take on it), send me an e-mail, or write it below. This can be fun.

Did I even Spell that Right? Oh whatever I don't care.
Anyways, I have a very Serious Question my main...eh...Dude, And this is Based on weather it had to do with Race, or if it was just to Make fun of the poor Beast. But why? WHY Wouldn't Those Damn Kids Ever give that Poor Rabbit Some Cerial? Why? "Silly Rabbit, trix are for kids" Why does it have to be that way? Why are they Only for kids? Trix Are Flavored with Fruits, And Rabbit's Eat Fruits, So Why the Hell not give that Poor Rabbit some Trix Cerial? Why do they Have to be So Nasty, WHY??!!!

Topher, man, I'm interested to hear your thoughts on this. Nutmeg and I have been pondering this situation for years now.

(P.S. Nutmeg, you got the "Ra--m" right. Racism. Close enough.)

Well, friends, this is one great question. I have thought long and hard about this. Nearly two months. I've analyzed it to it's simplest form, all the way to it's most complex way of answering.

Being that we are talking about a cereal for "kids," I have decided to answer it in the easiest way possible.

You see, this is not a case of racism, per say. For it is not just because he is a rabbit, that he cannot enjoy Trix. Race would need to explain things like, why Aunt Jemima is black, or why Uncle Ben isn't Oriental. Or why Mrs. Butterworth is not black, but brown, even after the syrup is gone. These things would be racial questions. I shall tackle those later on.

See, as you said, rabbits eat fruit. Trix, though fruit flavored, are far from real fruit. More like artificially flavored, sugar coated, corn puffs. However, they represent fruit.

Now when rabbits go into fruit beds, what happens? The farmer goes after him with a shovel. Perhaps the children are merely doing the Trix rabbit a service, by not allowing him to eat the cereal. Training him to find other things less dangerous to eat. Or perhaps, they are urging him to go after real fruit, so that the farmer will finally catch him, because children are psychotic, with a sugar coated exterior (kinda like the cereal is sugar coated. Weird, huh?). Either scenario is possible, you be the judge.

In either case, I don't think the kids are trying to be selfish, necessarily. I think kids are just being kids, saying that the Trix are just for them. "I, me, mine," kind of stuff, you know. And even though they will have more Trix for themselves by keeping the poor rabbit away from them, they don't think about the fact, that one day, they will be grown ups, and Trix will no longer be for them, either.

I, too lived in that world, when I was young. Thinking that Trix would always be for me. But alas, I have grown up. And reality has reared it's ugly head.

But I admit. I still sneak a bowl every now and then. Though I am an adult, not allowed to enjoy the cereal "just for kids," my inner child is still alive, and the cereal is for him. I hope this has helped.

Ok Topher. I've got one for you. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Inquiring minds want to know...

Ah, this is a question older than time... I had a little trouble with this one. So, instead of asking myself, I decided to take my question to the source himself... Mr. Woodchuck.

Chris: Hello, Mr. Woodchuck. Thanks for meeting me on such short notice.

Mr. Woodchuck: It was my pleasure.

Chris: I'm just going to get straight to the point. The question has been raised, time and time, again, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Can you tell me, what is the REAL answer to this?

Mr. Woodchuck: Hmmm... The typical answer would be: A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a wood chuck could if a woodchuck could chuck wood! But that's just a cop out, if you ask me.

Chris: I do ask you.

Mr. Woodchuck: In all actuality, we woodchucks are commonly known as groundhogs. We burrow, or chuck, dirt. Not wood. Though we are known to climb, and sometimes chew on pieces of wood, we usually stay close to the ground. Especially on February 2nd.

Chris: That reminds me, how com...

Mr. Woodchuck: I really don't want to go into that, today.

Chris: Understood. Well, thanks for your time. This has been a big help.

Mr. Woodchuck: Not a problem. If you require actual numbers, here is a website that breaks it down: http://www.getodd.com/stuf/stupid/woodchuck.html Now, if you'll excuse me, I must get back to my house. The wife wants to raid Mrs. Krenshaw's garden tonight.

Chris: By all means. Thanks, again. Well, there you have it. Straight from the Woodchuck (groundhog) himself.

Ok chris I have another question for you and by all means go to town on this one. How come it is acceptable for us as humans to use a shock collar on our pets while however it is seen as child abuse to use one on a child? I mean seriously do you realize how well behaved a child would be with the threat of being given a small jolt of electricity if they mess up?

Mister Topher, I Have a Question, What is the Real Secret Of Monkey Island? requiring Minds want to Know.( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_Island_(series) )

And yet still no answer to my question what is the deal?

You guys, I'm sorry I haven't gotten to answer your questions yet. But I have been pondering them, since I read them. My bro is getting married tomorrow, and there's been a lot to do. So I haven't been able to really get much online time. After the wedding's done. I promise, that I will not rest, I will not sleep, until these questions are answered in the most thorough and insane manner possible. Thank you for some awesome questions.

M_R_Wiley wrote:Ok chris I have another question for you and by all means go to town on this one. How come it is acceptable for us as humans to use a shock collar on our pets while however it is seen as child abuse to use one on a child? I mean seriously do you realize how well behaved a child would be with the threat of being given a small jolt of electricity if they mess up?

Alright, sir. The shock collar, while useful, is in my opinion, unacceptable altogether. I don't like the idea of one. But, I can understand the need for this question to be asked. You see, people use shock collars on pets to keep them in line. Lots of animals, (not dogs and cats, because they shouldn't EVER have the need for shock collars) do not understand basic commands. Nor do they have the intelligence to know that they are misbehaving. I can almost understand using shock collars on them. Eventually, they learn how to not get zapped.
The reason it would be considered child abuse, is because in this country, you can't spit on the sidewalk without being charged with vandalism. You can't call anyone stupid, or fat, or what have you, without the risk of being sued. And you can't even spank your child without being arrested for child abuse. So a shock collar is going to be completely out of the question.
But really, you wouldn't even need a shock collar for the kiddo's anyway... Not with the newest product to hit the market: "Electric Ritalin." How does it work? Everytime your child starts to become over excited, the chemical components (witheld) inside of each dose, send a negative charge through the childs entire body, rendering them paralyzed for 25 to 30 minutes. Never again will you have to worry about your child being overly rambunctious (never spelled that word in my life) not when you have the power of E. Electric Ritalin. Remove the zip, with a chemical zap.

nutmeg1992 wrote:Mister Topher, I Have a Question, What is the Real Secret Of Monkey Island? requiring Minds want to Know.( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_Island_(series) )

And what about my undying question? What IS the REAL Secret of monkey island?

Okay, here we go, nutmeg. The real secret of Monkey Island... is monkey feces (poo). You see, there were the three tasks that Guybrush had to complete to become a pirate. But they didn't mention the fourth task: Fire the cannonball of monkeypoo, into the mouth of the statue that he had previously stolen from the Governor's mansion. The thing about it, is that the poo is flaming. Now, you see, when the flaming poo cannonball enters the mouth of that statue, it fires a beam of light, that shines straight up into the sky, and brings forth other pirate ships. These pirate ships make their way to the shore of the island, in order to battle with the greatest pirate ship to ever sail the seven seas. When they are defeated, their ships are burned, and the ashes fed to the monkeys that live on the island. These monkeys live in a big cage. The ashes they eat, when mixed with their poo, create the "voodoo ingredient," that helps destroy ghosts. So how do they get the poo from the monkeys, you ask? They cannot necessarily walk in and get it, without being attacked, so instead, armed with buckets, they taunt the monkeys, with mocking faces and gestures, sometimes even puppets, until they decide to fling their defication at the men, who then catch it into their buckets. It's true, I'm not making this stuff up, I was there. So the real reason the governor was kidnapped, is because it was a ploy to have the statue returned. And this is because, they want the monkey poo for themselves, to make their own cannonballs, and set the forests of Monkey Island ablaze. So now that we are talking about a potential fire, should the poo get into the wrong hands (sounds gross), we must consider the five F's, when dealing with the causes of most forest fires. The five F's are as follows:
Flaming
Feces
Fuel
Forest
Fires
Why would they go through all the trouble of burning Monkey Island to the ground? You see, if the forests of the island, which produce the bananas (the bananas are special, because the poo that destroys the ghosts, sometimes gets desposed of, in the forests, which fertilize the trees, that grow the bananas. Just think about the circle of life) that get mixed with the ashes of the ships, were to burn down, it would cause an opposite reaction, and return the ghosts to their original state. Thereby creating a giant ghost pirate armada, and becoming the ultimate force of the seas. And that, in a nutshell, is the secret of Monkey Island. It's all a bunch of flaming poo. I hope this helps.

Topher J I have another question for you. I thought you said you were going to post here everyday? What Happend? I haven't seen you post in quite sometime.